FORGIVENESS
What happens to you when you cannot forgive?
Resentment
Hatred
Anger
Fear
Grudge Holding
Hostility
Struggle
Chained to the past
Self Righteousness
Self Pity
Negative Focus
Bitterness
Someone did you wrong. Someone hurt you. Can you forgive them? Never. Their behavior and actions were wrong, horrible, thoughtless, cruel, hurtful , unconscionable etc.
We have all felt like this. When you are at the place where forgiveness is not an option think again. Does failing to forgive hurt the other person? Sometimes is does but it ALWAYS hurts you. Perhaps you can forgive the person but not the behavior. That is perfectly fine and the way to go. Some behaviors are not acceptable. Some behaviors may be unforgivable. But how about the person. Can you forgive them? Yes you can if you think of forgiveness as letting go. It is letting go of all the powerful emotions you feel when you are hurt. This is to your benefit not the other person. You forgive to heal yourself not the other person.
Forgiveness if not a favor we do for someone else. It is what we do for ourselves. We release the powerful emotions that are muddling up our thoughts and joy.
Can you forgive yourself if you are the one that did the hurtful deed? Do you angush over what you did? It is the same whether you are hurt or the one that did the hurting.
Think back to when you were able to forgive. You sensed a release. You felt relaxed. The tension left your body. Your mind became open again to listen, enjoy, participate.
I found some quotes about forgiveness for you to ponder.
Nothing worth doing is completed in our lifetime,Therefore, we are saved by hope.Nothing true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history;Therefore, we are saved by faith.Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone.Therefore, we are saved by love.No virtuous act is quite a virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own;Therefore, we are saved by the final form of love which is forgiveness.
Reinhold Niebuhr:
Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.
Sidney and Suzanne Simon
To not forgive them is like taking the poison (continuing to suffer for what they did or didn't do to you) and expecting THEM to die!
"In this life. . . we are unable to forget whatever remains unforgiven. So, if we won't let go of some pain - whose time has now past - then who is to blame for the weight of this burden still being carried on our back?"
Guy Finley
"There are those who will tell you why it is wise to never forget the pain of the past. . . but if you look closely at the anger, sorrow, and bitterness that has hardened their faces, then you will also see why learning to forgive is the better of the two paths."
Guy Finley
Mona Gustafson Affinito says, "Forgiveness means deciding not to punish a perceived injustice, taking action on that decision, and experiencing the emotional relief that follows."
I also found a short quizz for you to take to see where you are at on forgiveness.
Quizz
Marcia, Your Confidence Coach
PS Drop me a note.
What happens to you when you cannot forgive?
Resentment
Hatred
Anger
Fear
Grudge Holding
Hostility
Struggle
Chained to the past
Self Righteousness
Self Pity
Negative Focus
Bitterness
Someone did you wrong. Someone hurt you. Can you forgive them? Never. Their behavior and actions were wrong, horrible, thoughtless, cruel, hurtful , unconscionable etc.
We have all felt like this. When you are at the place where forgiveness is not an option think again. Does failing to forgive hurt the other person? Sometimes is does but it ALWAYS hurts you. Perhaps you can forgive the person but not the behavior. That is perfectly fine and the way to go. Some behaviors are not acceptable. Some behaviors may be unforgivable. But how about the person. Can you forgive them? Yes you can if you think of forgiveness as letting go. It is letting go of all the powerful emotions you feel when you are hurt. This is to your benefit not the other person. You forgive to heal yourself not the other person.
Forgiveness if not a favor we do for someone else. It is what we do for ourselves. We release the powerful emotions that are muddling up our thoughts and joy.
Can you forgive yourself if you are the one that did the hurtful deed? Do you angush over what you did? It is the same whether you are hurt or the one that did the hurting.
Think back to when you were able to forgive. You sensed a release. You felt relaxed. The tension left your body. Your mind became open again to listen, enjoy, participate.
I found some quotes about forgiveness for you to ponder.
Nothing worth doing is completed in our lifetime,Therefore, we are saved by hope.Nothing true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history;Therefore, we are saved by faith.Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone.Therefore, we are saved by love.No virtuous act is quite a virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own;Therefore, we are saved by the final form of love which is forgiveness.
Reinhold Niebuhr:
Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.
Sidney and Suzanne Simon
To not forgive them is like taking the poison (continuing to suffer for what they did or didn't do to you) and expecting THEM to die!
"In this life. . . we are unable to forget whatever remains unforgiven. So, if we won't let go of some pain - whose time has now past - then who is to blame for the weight of this burden still being carried on our back?"
Guy Finley
"There are those who will tell you why it is wise to never forget the pain of the past. . . but if you look closely at the anger, sorrow, and bitterness that has hardened their faces, then you will also see why learning to forgive is the better of the two paths."
Guy Finley
Mona Gustafson Affinito says, "Forgiveness means deciding not to punish a perceived injustice, taking action on that decision, and experiencing the emotional relief that follows."
I also found a short quizz for you to take to see where you are at on forgiveness.
Quizz
Marcia, Your Confidence Coach
PS Drop me a note.
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