Do you "Pretend" to do too Much?

I have a friend, Tessa. Actually she is leaving the friend category and moving to the acquaintance category.

Let me tell you why. I have known Tessa for two years. Tessa and I met a club. Tessa volunteered for almost every position that was open at this club. I actually volunteered for one of the positions but Tessa took over. She made a statement that she had to leave early so she is volunteering for everything and then left the meeting instantly. I had no time to say anything.

I got over it. After Tessa volunteered for everything she rarely attended the club meetings. Once in a while she would pop in and say she is sorry she is busy and will get going shortly. Then we did not see her again at the meetings until she would pop in again and say the same thing.

Eventually there was a discussion of where she was and what was she doing. Did she leave the club? No one was happy with Tessa. She took on a responsibility and did not follow through.

These questions were directed at me because I was her friend. I did not want to get down on her although I had to agree with the members. She volunteered for everything and was not in attendance nor did she do what she promised. All I could say was that I would call her.

Tessa suffers from "pretending to do too much." This is true in her personal life also. If I call her to just talk she is too busy. If and when we can talk all Tessa talks about is what she has to do. Yet she rarely gets anything done. She is still attempting to do things she wanted to do two years ago. Not long range, big things. Just little every day things like cleaning a room in her house.

Once Tessa told me she has a slight (?) problem with organization and getting things done. I told her I could help her with that. She never took up the offer. Actually she was a little defensive with my offer.

When you suffer from "pretending to do too much" this is a typical reaction.

If I take apart Tessa's behavior I see a person that is disorganized, in chaos and unable to get out of that state. Thinking you are busy can allow you to run away from what is really going on in your life. I mean how can you look at much? You are too busy and you have so much to do?

This behavior is also a way to feel sorry for yourself. You set yourself up to fail and you do fail. Tessa knows she is not accomplishing anything. Every time she starts to do what she needs to a "pretend" emergency pops up and she has to take care of the "pretend" emergency. By the end of the day all she has done is deal with "pretend" emergencies.

Here is the really bizarre thing. The more Tessa "pretends" how busy she is and what she has to do the less prodcutive Tessa is. Yet Tessa does not recognize this. Likewise the less Tessa gets done the more down she is on herself. And this feeling is better to sit with than the ones she is running away from.

What a crazy way to live, but we all have been there. The problem is not that we have all been there but only if we stay there like Tessa.

So how do we get out of this whirlpool?

First off realize that volunteering to do too much will not make you important or respected. It won't. It will just piss people off if you do not follow through.

Second recognize what you really need to do and what can wait.

Third do not get distracted by "pretend" emergencies. Stick to what you decied to get done. Then do it.

Lastly stop running away from those problems that are giving you stress and sorrow. You may not be able to solve them but you must acknowledge them. If you don't you will be like Tessa. You will be running around in a circle disappointing yourself and those around you.

Next you will get angry and feel unappreciated. Next you will either get pissy or depressed. All because you "pretended" to be too busy.

Gte back into your life. You can't run away from it. It follows you wherever you go.

If you must feel important then feel important becasue you accomplished something. Not beause you volunteered for everything and then did nothing.

If you are another Tessa get help now. Here is how.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Dream Job Don't Get Scammed

Work at home and do not get scammed. That is it. Get the report and you will avoid the traps and pitfalls of the scammers.

Look before you leap. Then leap.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Whats Up?

It is spring. Summer is quickly approaching. What season are you in with your life. Where are you at? What's going on? What's up?

I like to do polling and see the mental states of people. The pulse I am getting is that some of you are perfectly happy with where you are in life. You are feeling good and pleased with your life. I am happy to hear that.

Unfortunately most of you are just getting by. You are apathetic. You would like some change but you just can not get around to it.

You lack motivation. You lack desire. You are treading water. You are putting in effort to stay where you are even though you are disappointend with where you are.

If you think about this you will realize it makes no sense. By treading water and putting in effort you are wasting time and energy.

The time and energy you put into staying where you are can be used to go somewhere else. What is that about?

You are motivated to stay where you are. You desire to stay where you are. You are disappointed with where you are.

What's up with that?

Isn't it time you stopped this charade? Isn't it time for you to make a change? Isn't it time for you to get your act in gear?

If you are depressed then get a handle on it now.

If you are procrastinating then learn how to stop.

If you need to get your head on straight get going.

You can do it.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Humor can Expand Your Mind

Q & A. I found this humorous and thought provoking post. It asks a question and then collects answers. The answers vary depending on who answered and their point of view.

There is no right or wrong answer. This is a question of opinion. Opinion is just someones point of view. There may be facts and reason to back up the point of view. However, there may be other points of view with other facts and reason. It is up to you to decide or not which point of view makes sense to you. Perhaps most have some value to you. Perhaps you are not seeking an answer but a way to open your mind to think in a different way. Perhaps humour and satire will help you do this.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD???

Plato: For the greater good.

Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.

Machiavelli:
The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its
pancreas.

Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment
would let it take.

Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road
gazes also across you.

Oliver North: National Security was at stake.

B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences which had pervaded its
sensorium from birth had caused it to develop in such a
fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while
believing these actions to be of its own free will.

Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt
necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at
this historical juncture, and therefore
synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself,
the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed
the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Aristotle: To actualize its potential.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-
nature.

Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing
events to grace the annals of history. An historic,
unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt
such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to
homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurrence.

Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from
the trees.

Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.

Epicurus: For fun.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken
was on, but it was moving very fast.

David Hume: Out of custom and habit.

Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored)
reason.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

The Sphinx: You tell me.

Henry David Thoreau: To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow
out of life.

Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Wordsworth: To wander lonely as a cloud.

Keats: Philosophy will clip a chicken's wings.

Blake: To see heaven in a wild fowl.

Othello: Jealousy.

Dr Johnson: Sir, had you known the Chicken for as long as I have,
you would not so readily enquire, but feel rather the
Need to resist such a public Display of your own
lamentable and incorrigible Ignorance.

Oscar Wilde: Why, indeed? One's social engagements whilst in
town ought never expose one to such barbarous
inconvenience - although, perhaps, if one must cross a
road, one may do far worse than to cross it as the
chicken in question.

Kafka: Hardly the most urgent enquiry to make of a low-grade
insurance clerk who woke up that morning as a hen.

Swift: It is, of course, inevitable that such a loathsome,
filth-ridden and degraded creature as Man should assume
to question the actions of one in all respects his
superior.

Darwin:
Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads


Dr. Seuss:
Did the chicken cross the road?Did he cross it with a toad?Yes the chicken crossed the road,but why it crossed, I've not been told!

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: Our soon-to-be-released Chicken '98 will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

Groucho Marx:
Chicken? What's all this talk about chicken? Why, I had an uncle who thought he was a chicken. My aunt almost divorced him, but we needed the eggs.

***********************************************************************

Open up your mind. Deep thinking can do that but so can levity. Take a break today to laugh and smile.

Marcia. Your Confidence Coach

Monday Must Have

It is Monday again. Fresh start, new week.

Are you willing to make a fresh start or are you dragging your feet? Did you have a week end where you got things done but it is never enough? There is so much more left to do.

If you examine this you will find out that you are probably expecting to do too much. Some things are probably not that important. Some things could be done easier and more efficiently. Some things could be delegated. Some things could be outsourced.

Of course that is up to you to take a look from a fresh perspective. If you are refusing to look from a fresh perspective you are probably one of those type of people that think you must do everything by yourself. Only you can and know how to do everything.

You think everything is important. You have not found efficiency. You refuse to delegate because it is not done "your way" or to your standards. Outsourcing is costly and you do not trust that anyway.

So here you are a person on the verge. Tired, stressed out, over worked, over loaded. Monday is not your fresh start. It is more drudgery.

Is this the life you want to lead?

I have one suggestion.

If you are an online marketer then this product will save you time. It will help with your efficiency. It is not expensive. It is an investment in you having a better life. It is an investment in getting rid of stress. It is an investment in cutting down work overload.

Since you are one of those obstinate people I am ordering you to purchase it. If I don't order you I know you will make up excuses not to get it. I use the word"make up" because that is what you do when you get the chance to ease your life. You make up excuses why you are the only one that must and can do everything yourself.

Yet you know this is not true. You can not do everything yourself. Look at how you feel today. Look at your backlog of things you did not do. Will you ever get them done? No!

Break the mold. Drop it. Stop it.

Get this product and put some ease into your life. Get off the "only I can do everything" merry go round. Make Monday a fresh start. Enjoy yourself. Enjoy your life.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

PS This is your MONDAY MUST HAVE.

Confidence 101

I found this great site about confidence.



CONFIDENCE 101

Enjoy the week end.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Internet Marketing Mania Continues

I am still reminding you about Internet Marketing Mania. The package will not go away. Anyone that wants it can get it. There is no countdown and no the price will not be increased.
Why? Because the maniac just wants to share this wonderful package with you. The maniac wants to make some money and the maniac wants you to be successful and make some money too.

Of course the maniac does not know you but the maniac appreciates something of value and the maniac is sure you do too. The maniac also appreciates a low purchase price for something worthwhile and is sure you do too.

Did you look at what you get? Please don't tell me you did not look at the package. Shame on you. How do you know you don't need it? Unless you are one of those playing at being an internet marketer. Then you are right. You don't need it.

But if you are not one of those then go check it out. Every day you wait you waste time doing things the hard way. Everyday you wait you loose time. Everyday you wait you have to work harder.

Time is of the essencce. GET MARKETING.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Internet Marketing Mania

Yesterday I gave you the heads up on Internet Marketing Mania and the "maniac."

Today I am going to drill you. Why? Because if you did not get this product I must show you the error of your ways? Why? because I want to save you from yourself. Why? Because I want to help you make it and make it big.

What if I told you that you could spend less time on the technical, dull, irritating activities you must do for your internet marketing business? What if I told you that you could use this new found time on more important things in your business or personal life?

Would you argue with me and say, "No, Marcia. I want to waste my time doing things the long hard way. I don't want to do things the easy, time saving way."

Would you argue with me and say, "No, Marcia. I do not want to spend my time on important business and personal things. No, Marcia. I do not want to spend more time with my family. No, Marcia. I do not want to spend more time with my honey. No, Marcia. I do no want to spend more time doing what I enjoy."

Would you argue with me and say, "No Marcia. I am successful but I do not want the time to enjoy my accomplishments?"

Of course not. You would run and get Internet Marketing Mania. CLICK HERE.

I knew you were smart. I just knew you needed to be enlightened. Now you are. So get on the ball. Make your life easier.

"He who hesitates is lost" Do you want to be lost?

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Internet Marketing Maniac on the Loose

I have something great, wonderful, exciting to share with you only if you are serious about Internet marketing.

It does not matter what stage your are in with you Internet marketing business. What matters is that you are sincere and serious.

The Internet Marketing Maniac (I know it is a crazy name) has put together a software package that every serious Internet marketer needs and must have. Needs and must have if you want to make your business simpler and easier and more successful.

This is a package of NINE pieces of software. The rule in advertising is not to tell the price. When you are marketing you should not tell the price. Okay I have said that twice....... And I am going to tell you the price.

Why am I breaking the marketing rules? Because the price is ridiculous inexpensive. I'd be a fool to not tell you the price.

Drum roll..................$97.00 for TEN pieces of excellent, state of the art, must have software. That is $9.70 per piece of software. Internet Marketing Mania is brought to you by the Internet Marketing Maniac. He must be a maniac to price this product so low.

He is probably chastising himself right now for such a low price but too bad for him. You will buy it and have it and use it and he can't take it back. It is yours for this super, crazy, low price.

Get it now before The Internet Marketing Maniac gets sane and raises the price.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Join the Movement

JOIN THE MOVEMENT

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

Improve your Business

I have shared with you some awesome products that can give your business the self improvement it needs.

You know you want to pump up your business. You know it needs more help.

You need to spend money to make money. You do not need to spend huge sums of money but you do need to fund your business. Spending on education and learning how to make your business successful is vital.

The products I have shown you are cost effective and fairly inexpensive. They are an investment in yourself and your business.

Businesses fail due to poor decision making. A poor decision could be to not fund your business. A poor decision could be to not educate yourself about how to operate your business.

Business logic is funny. Sometimes you think you have a genius idea and it tanks. It tanked because genius ideas and business success do not always go hand in hand.

That is why purchasing a product that has been developed and tested is the better choice than a genius idea.

So check out the products and find the one that will help your business succeed.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

PS If you buy any product I have shared with you I want to give you a bonus. E mail me your receipt to arnold@selfimprovementtoolshop.com to get your bonus.

Business in a Box

The Affiliate Business Blueprint

What is this all about??? I could be snappy and truthful and say this is about having a business blueprint for an affiliate.

Having a business is good. Being an affiliate is beneficial because you can have a business and market someone else's product. Having a blueprint is certainly worthwhile.

I have found an unbiased review of this product that you can view.

Affiliate Business Blueprint eBook Review

Review Author: Terah Logan

Affiliate Business Blueprint.

Brought to you by Jim Edwards and Rosalind Gardner.

These two affiliate marketers take the daunting task of marketing other peoples products (affiliate marketing) and break it down into basic steps that you can apply to any product and niche you wish to market online.

It truly is a `Blue Print'. I have used their suggestions - step by step - and achieved results that were fast and effective. The course is presented in PDF format as well as mp3's of their tele-seminars. You can listen to the whole course and then read the transcripts. I was very pleased with the presentation of this course.


While they don't offer you any bonuses - Jim and Rosalind say the product is so good they don't have to offer `bonuses' - the information is complete. It's a big package with solid information pertaining to all aspects of affiliate marketing. From deciding which affiliate programs are worth your while, to designing your website and the content it should contain, to the exact approach you should take to win your customers confidence thus creating a 24/7 income stream. The advice given is suitable for beginners as well as seasoned marketers.

If you only buy one Affiliate Marketing information product I would have to say this one should be it. This product is professional with tried and true affiliate marketing techniques; it is presented in an entertaining, eye-opening format that is sure to please.

*********************************************************************

Here is the exciting part. If you purchase this product from me here I will give you a bonus. I will give you Auto Responder Magic.

All you have to do is e mail your receipt to arnold@selfimprovementtoolshop.com and I will send you your bonus.

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach

E Commerce Success Secrets

I always like to find ways for you to get going on your path. Here is a great article for your e commerce success.

*****************************************

3 Secrets to "Striking it Rich" in Cyberspace
- by Jim Edwards
(c) Jim Edwards - All Rights reserved

http://www.thenetreporter.com

In the few seconds it takes you to read this another domain name gets registered at www.NetworkSolutions.com, theInternet's oldest and largest domain name registrar.

Everyone from industrial giants to corner flower shops currently wants to stake a profitable claim in cyberspace.

The lure of low startup costs compared to brick-and-mortar operations and the promise of high rewards draws an ever-swelling crowd of merchants to the online marketplace.
Yet despite the optimism statistics tell us that 80% of these "e" businesses will fail within their first 12 months of operation.

People from all over the country ask me what it takes to succeed in the e-commerce world once they've completed the basic steps for getting online.

The following three keys virtually *guarantee success* for any online enterprise.

The First Key:
A Quality product or service with highly evident and readily understood benefits for consumers.
If your product or service does not represent the highest quality and value possible, and if consumers don't understand exactly why they should buy from you, the speed of the Internet will just expose your shortcomings to the marketplace that much quicker.

In the offline world a product's benefits, not the features,cause consumers to make buying decisions.

A man doesn't buy a car with a 5 liter engine because of the horsepower, he buys it for the feeling of supremacy and control he thinks it will give him.

Kids don't want a 1000mHz computer for computing power in doing homework, they want to play the latest games.

The Internet magnifies this "what's in it for me" benefits-driven evaluation by consumers.
Products or services presented with readily understood,self-serving benefits for consumers sell best online (andoff).

The Second Key:
An excellent website that loads fast, provides pertinent information to targeted consumers, and allows them to make online purchases quickly and securely.

Your website should: · Load fast by making conservative use of graphics. (Go to yahoo.com for an excellent example.)
· Provide exactly the information your potential customers want and need.
· Make it extremely easy for surfers to navigate your siteand find exactly what they want.
· Look good on both the Netscape and Internet Explorer web browsers at various screen resolutions (640x480, 800x600,etc.).

The Third Key:
Consistent, targeted website traffic by consumers capable of buying your product or service.
Imagine buying a 50 foot billboard and, instead of putting it out by the highway, you hid it in your basement. Nobody would see it! The same thing happens if you don't actively and continuously promote your website to attract visitors.

With its incredible speed and communications power, the Internet acts as a magnifying glass for any organization's strengths and weaknesses. E-commerce, e-mail, and a website won't do the job of marketing, selling, and customer service for any company. They will, however, help every organization perform all of those business functions better, faster, and less expensively with the real and tangible result of "strikingit rich" in cyberspace!
===============================================

Jim Edwards & David Garfinkel are co-authors of the NEW"eBook Secrets Exposed": How to Make MASSIVE Amounts ofMoney - In Record Time - With Your Own eBook!

WHY are some people getting positively RICH selling ebooks? Visit here http://hop.clickbank.net/?arnoldc/ebksecrets

Marcia, Your Confidence Coach